As a rule, I do not, I repeat, DO NOT write poetry.
However, in the spirit of the day I will besmirch my good name and do otherwise.
You and I R2 of a Kind
By B. Hanson
I promise I’ll keep you warm at night
And remember how kind you are,
Even when we fight.
I won’t tell anyone about the time
you watched half of a Harry Potter movie with me . . .
(Oh wait, I just did.
Sorry about that.
Crap. Where was I?)
. . .
It was so adorable how you bought a Star Wars T-shirt,
to look more legit in front of me.
And although the it’s all faded now,
It’s still my favorite one to see
(oh my *bleep* I hate rhyming)
. . .
Yes, my next glasses will be even bigger for you.
I’ll even wear the fancy shoe (s)
Just make sure you clean the kitchen
And I have cold beer when work is through.
(It is THAT important and yes I put it in a poem. Shut up.)
. . .
I won’t talk through Archer,
So long as we don’t miss Game of Thrones
We’re first in line at Hunger Games
And you can jailbreak my old iPhones.
(How long are poems supposed to be? What the *bleep* do I do? I hate this.)
. . .
You get the stuff for me in tall cabinets,
and thanks for thinking I’m cute,
when I have the stomach flu,
I’m stoked you love the Swedish Chef,
A gerde shmerde ferdin duue.
(Would you stop judging? This is getting harder by the line with all you jerks out there judging.)
. . . .
PG Tips and Pen Pens,
Craft Brew and Gosling Memes,
Your Grandpa’s advice on marriage . . .
or at least how to keep a man ( Fo, you’re the best)
You’re just the one it seems.
( You thought it was dead. It wasn’t dead yet. It got better. Bitches.)
. . .
You encourage all my nerding,
And taste test all my food,
You laugh at all my stupid jokes
and I laugh at yours too.
You’re the droid I’ve been looking for,
I love you and you know,
Anything I ask is
“As You Wish”
. . . um . . .
. . . frak . . .
(I ran out of ideas. Ok well, whatever. You got the idea. You rock. Happy Valentine’s Day. Man I really suck at this. Sorry about that. I’ll just stick to news. I’m better at writing about brothel stings and death. Oh the HUMANITY and such.)